Paul’s Thing

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Hi! I'm Paul. This is my blog. It is the best blog.

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© 2004-2017 Paul Woodford. All rights reserved.

Friday Bag o’ Remorse

Remorse, yes; major-sin remorse, no. More like mild feelings of guilt for neglecting the blog, and you, my reader. I knew this would happen when I took on a competing writing task, my memoir, which creeps along in the background, one painfully-extracted sentence at a time.

The day before yesterday I sent out a Paulgram […]

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Seven Words

I’m assuming everyone is up on the story of the Texas lady with the “Fuck Trump and Fuck You for Voting for Him” sticker on her pickup truck and how a local sheriff threatened to arrest her for displaying it, and later did arrest her on another pretext, and how she’s back on the streets […]

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I Know You Are, But What Am I?

As Trump and his court crank up the volume of their attacks on “fake news,” their actual agenda is increasingly clear: they want news that makes Trump look bad suppressed, possibly even outlawed, like they do for dictators and royalty in other countries. […]

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Leave Kathy Alone!

Lemme know when Kathy Griffin starts murdering people on the Metro. Then maybe I’ll give a shit about the message she’s sending. I thought the mock beheading photo was timely, appropriate, and well within the bounds of acceptable political discourse. And anyway, who’s to say HBO didn’t stage the whole thing … the photo, the […]

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.999 Fine Copper

Dude laid a tip on me after my tram tour at the air museum. He walked up, said “Thank you for your service,” and stuck his hand out. I shook back and felt a coin pressing against my palm. I glanced down to see what looked like a gold Rand and immediately thought to myself […]

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Reading the Signs

Yes, the beard is gone. Like an infant discovering its tongue, I’d become obsessively aware of the hair on my face, touching it, scratching at it, thinking about it day and night. The symptoms were signs, and they read: “A shave / That’s real / No cuts to heal / A soothing / Velvet after-feel / Burma-Shave.” […]

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Best You’ve Ever Seen?

I probably shouldn’t say anything about the latest social media witch hunt, but when has common sense ever prevented me from talking about things that upset people? […]

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Thursday Bag o’ Cautious Optimism

Parents of adult children should be able to relate to this: our 40-year-old daughter Polly left her boyfriend in late June and moved in with us. It’s just until she gets back on her feet, we told ourselves. Since then she’s been employed three times: once for two weeks, once for two days, once for […]

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