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Hi! I'm Paul. This is my blog. It is the best blog.

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© 2004-2017 Paul Woodford. All rights reserved.

Leave Kathy Alone!

crocker2007Lemme know when Kathy Griffin starts murdering people on the Metro. Then maybe I’ll give a shit about the message she’s sending. I thought the mock beheading photo was timely, appropriate, and well within the bounds of acceptable political discourse. And anyway, who’s to say HBO didn’t stage the whole thing … the photo, the social media meltdown, the apology … as a teaser for the final season of Game of Thrones? Huh? Betcha didn’t think of that!

I was dismayed to hear USAA’s going to advertise on Sean Hannity’s TV and radio shows, but then I learned they they were going to start advertising on Rachel Maddow’s show too. A while back, apparently, USAA had stopped airing ads on shows they considered partisan. Now they’ve had second thoughts and decided to start advertising again, doing business with right- and left-wing outlets. This set off another social media curfuffle (look it up, kerfuffle-head), but I’m not joining the boycott. We’ve been with USAA since I joined the military in 1973. Over the years we’ve filed a few claims, and they’ve always been great. And by great I mean great: fast, courteous, honest, the works. Claims are where it counts, and USAA’s always come through. They also pay annual dividends, and last year’s was a decent hunk of change.

We’re staying the course. If USAA wants to follow the Swiss model and do business with everyone, I’m okay with that. Hannity is a stupid man and a partisan hack, but he’s not in the same league as racist hate-mongers like Rush Limbaugh and Alex Jones. USAA, I hope you’re not going to advertise with that lot … I’ll change my decision in a heartbeat, you hear?

Surely entrepreneurs are already selling stickers and decals of Kathy Griffin holding the severed bloody head of Donald Trump. I don’t have the guts to put anything like that on my USAA-insured car, but two days ago I ordered a white oval bumper sticker with a single word on it: resist. Least I can do. Never forget that we, the people, voted for Hillary Clinton, and that the current occupant of the White House is illegitimate, literally #NotOurPresident.


BrllaA friend is undergoing chemo and just returned home from two weeks in hospital. Her immune system is down and she can’t have pets in the house; her dog’s with us for the time being. Bella is a little jumpy yappy thing, but she’s settling down fast, taking lessons in chill from Maxie and me.

Hey, I thought about that “in hospital.” Not long ago I’d have made a point of saying “in the hospital” like a good American. But we don’t say “in the hospice,” now, do we? No, we say “in hospice.”

Donna’s in Las Vegas for Quentin’s eighth-grade graduation. Am I allowed to say, without anyone thinking I don’t love my grandson, that middle-school graduations are a crock? I mean, exactly what is that middle-school diploma worth? I know, I’m griping about modern times like some lame-ass old, but I am old. My generation went to work in the coal mines as soon as we were old enough to swing a pick. Middle-school graduations, forsooth!

I think after Donna comes home Sunday we’ll start looking for another miniature dachshund. We raised Schatzi from a puppy, taught her everything she knew. So we’re not going to look for an adult dog but another puppy instead, even though it’s a lot of work. It’s worth it.

© 2017, Paul Woodford. All rights reserved.

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2 comments to Leave Kathy Alone!

  • Reliza

    There’s actually a logical difference between “hospital” and “hospice.” At least, I think there is. “Hospital” refers to a building or location, while “hospice” refers to a type of care. Thus, “in surgery” v. “in the operating room,” where “in operating room” would sound silly. “In school” referring to a course of study” v. “in the school” referring to a building. Just a thought. Or thoughts. Or,to fans of “Beyond the Fringe,” apples.

  • There is a logical difference in American English … or is there? The British say “in hospital,” which may refer to a type of care as well: care for those likely to get better, as opposed to hospice care. It sounds pretentious when an American says “in hospital,” though, and I was bothered enough by my word choice to point it out.

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