"No matter how cynical I get, I can’t keep up.” — Lily Tomlin
It’s Saturday, and I’m listening to NPR. Which reminds of something I’ve been meaning to ask other public radio listeners . . . is it just me, or has Garrison Keillor lost his spark? I still pay attention to the Lake Wobegon stories, but I pretty much tune out the rest of his show. How […]
Picture this: Last night, a 14-year-old boy stole an earthmover in mid-town Tucson and drove it, with over 25 police units in pursuit, from one side of town to the other. As we watched the live reports on TV, we felt like we were living in Los Angeles, not sleepy little Tucson . . . […]
Businesses that employ professional drivers require applicants to submit copies of their driving records. And where do applicants go to get copies? Duhn-duhn-duhn-duhn . . . yes, Virginia, the Department of Motor Vehicles . . . there, there, I didn’t mean to make you cry! It could have been worse. It took only three hours, […]
I don’t like to simply link to another blogger’s post, but damn, Photodude couldn’t be more spot on than he is in this entry. Then again, if it weren’t for institutional absurdity, where would we get all the good jokes? For sure, Joseph Heller would never have been able to write Catch-22. . . .
Las Vegas: What Happens Here, Stays Here. I hate that slogan. Like people go to Las Vegas for sex orgies or something. The people I see on the Strip are with their spouses, and, quite often, their children. They’re doing things in Vegas that need to stay in Vegas? We drove up last weekend to […]
THE TREE-CREEPS ARE GIVING ME NIGHTMARES! CALL KING WINKLES ON HIS SUBMARINE TELEPHONES! CLICK ON THE TREE-CREEP’S PHOTO! IT IS A LINK!!!!
There are scumbags, and then there are scumbags: The injured employee was immediately sent to the hospital less than 2 miles away. The General Manager then went to the serving counter to have the machine shut down, begin the sanitizing procedures and remove the affected bucket of custard. In the few moments between the time […]
As in: the preverbal nail in the coffin. Other examples, picked up here and there: Living in Georgia is the eternal pit of the preverbal Hell The preverbal hell on earth End up in the preverbal dog house I’m tempted to classify “preverbal” for “proverbial” as an eggcorn, but on second thought it’s more of […]