God Bless Us Every One (Spammers Too)

commentspamI wasn’t thinking about comment spam when I started blogging, but comment spam was thinking about me. After the second time I was up past midnight deleting comment spam, I clamped down by requiring users to register and log in before posting comments. That eliminated comment spam, but it also came close to eliminating real comments, because who wants the hassle of filling out a registration form and then logging in each time they visit the blog?

Reader comments are what make blogs worth reading, IMO, and I always wished I could just give every reader blanket permission to comment. Well, anti-spam filters have gotten better, so a couple of months ago I did just that. Comments are now open; no registration or log-in required.

It’s working well, I’m happy to say. Readers are starting to post comments, and pretty soon we might even start solving the world’s problems together.

The downside is that spammers might start posting bogus comments again, so I built in an extra firewall, just in case the anti-spam software doesn’t pick them off: comments from people who haven’t commented before are subject to moderation. Since spammers always use different email addresses they’ll be treated as first-time commenters and their submissions … the few that sneak past the anti-spam plugins … will come to me for review and approval. Naturally, I’ll delete comment spam before any of you ever see it. So far, so good. It’s working.

But here’s the weird thing: comment spammers haven’t been trying to post comments. Instead, they’re trying to register. I’m getting six or seven new registrations every day, all from spammers or spambots. What the hell? And what’s the point? I’m the only one who sees registration forms … what good is spam if no one sees it?

Oh, well, at least I don’t have to do more than glance at these registration forms to tell they’re bogus. Real people don’t write like this: “Wow your article is salubrious to the topmost, in my opinion if  bloggers made good content as you did I will share this fenderous writing at every occasion.” Nor do they include hyperlinks to Russian Bride websites.

Last night a spammer attempting to register mistakenly sent the top secret spambot master text file. Now I know where they get their robotic mix & match words and phrases. I’m certain I wasn’t supposed to see this, but since I did I’m going to share it with you. It’s below the fold.

Before you go there … if you dare … I just want to wish all of you, even you spammers, a happy holiday season. May it be {more|even more} {approximately|about} {interesting|fascinating|attention-grabbing} {nice|pleasant|good|fastidious}.

 From: NZ <zpmasterz@hotmail.com>

Subject: [your-subject]

Message Body:
{
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I {couldn’t|could not} {resist|refrain from} commenting. {Very well|Perfectly|Well|Exceptionally well} written!|
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{It is|It’s} {appropriate|perfect|the best} time to make some plans for the future and {it is|it’s} time to be happy. {I have|I’ve} read this post and if I could I {want to|wish to|desire to} suggest you {few|some} interesting things or {advice|suggestions|tips}. {Perhaps|Maybe} you {could|can} write next articles referring to this article. I {want to|wish to|desire to} read {more|even more} things about it!|
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{Saved as a favorite|bookmarked!!}, {I really like|I like|I love} {your blog|your site|your web site|your website}!|
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{I love|I really like|I enjoy|I like|Everyone loves} what you guys {are|are usually|tend to be} up too. {This sort of|This type of|Such|This kind of} clever work and {exposure|coverage|reporting}! Keep up the {superb|terrific|very good|great|good|awesome|fantastic|excellent|amazing|wonderful} works guys I’ve {incorporated||added|included} you guys to {|my|our||my personal|my own} blogroll.|
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{I love|I really like|I enjoy|I like|Everyone loves} what you guys {are|are usually|tend to be} up too. {This sort of|This type of|Such|This kind of} clever work and {exposure|coverage|reporting}! Keep up the {superb|terrific|very good|great|good|awesome|fantastic|excellent|amazing|wonderful} works guys I’ve {incorporated|added|included} you guys to {|my|our|my personal|my own} blogroll.|
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{I love|I really like|I like|Everyone loves} it {when people|when individuals|when folks|whenever people} {come together|get together} and share {opinions|thoughts|views|ideas}. Great {blog|website|site}, {keep it up|continue the good work|stick with it}!|
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{Howdy|Hi there|Hey there|Hello|Hey} just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The {text|words} in your {content|post|article} seem to be running off the screen in {Ie|Internet explorer|Chrome|Firefox|Safari|Opera}. I’m not sure if this is a {format|formatting} issue or something to do with {web browser|internet browser|browser} compatibility but I {thought|figured} I’d post to let you know. The {style and design|design and style|layout|design} look great though! Hope you get the {problem|issue} {solved|resolved|fixed} soon. {Kudos|Cheers|Many thanks|Thanks}|
This is a topic {that is|that’s|which is} {close to|near to} my heart… {Cheers|Many thanks|Best wishes|Take care|Thank you}! {Where|Exactly where} are your contact details though?|
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{Hola|Hey there|Hi|Hello|Greetings}! I’ve been {following|reading} your {site|web site|website|weblog|blog} for {a long time|a while|some time} now and finally got the {bravery|courage} to go ahead and give you a shout out from {New Caney|Kingwood|Huffman|Porter|Houston|Dallas|Austin|Lubbock|Humble|Atascocita} {Tx|Texas}! Just wanted to {tell you|mention|say} keep up the {fantastic|excellent|great|good} {job|work}!|
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{Howdy|Hi there|Hi|Hello}, i read your blog {occasionally|from time to time} and i own a similar one and i was just {wondering|curious} if you get a lot of spam {comments|responses|feedback|remarks}? If so how do you {prevent|reduce|stop|protect against} it, any plugin or anything you can {advise|suggest|recommend}? I get so much lately it’s driving me {mad|insane|crazy} so any {assistance|help|support} is very much appreciated.|
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{Hi there|Hello there|Howdy}! This {post|article|blog post} {couldn’t|could not} be written {any better|much better}! {Reading through|Looking at|Going through|Looking through} this {post|article} reminds me of my previous roommate! He {always|constantly|continually} kept {talking about|preaching about} this. {I will|I’ll|I am going to|I most certainly will} {forward|send} {this article|this information|this post} to him. {Pretty sure|Fairly certain} {he will|he’ll|he’s going to} {have a good|have a very good|have a great} read. {Thank you for|Thanks for|Many thanks for|I appreciate you for} sharing!|
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{I am|I’m} {extremely|really} impressed with your writing skills {and also|as well as} with the layout on your {blog|weblog}. Is this a paid theme or did you {customize|modify} it yourself? {Either way|Anyway} keep up the {nice|excellent} quality writing, {it’s|it is} rare to see a {nice|great} blog like this one {these days|nowadays|today}.|
{I am|I’m} {extremely|really} {inspired|impressed} {with your|together with your|along with your} writing {talents|skills|abilities} {and also|as {smartly|well|neatly} as} with the {layout|format|structure} {for your|on your|in your|to your} {blog|weblog}. {Is this|Is that this} a paid {subject|topic|subject matter|theme} or did you {customize|modify} it {yourself|your self}? {Either way|Anyway} {stay|keep} up the {nice|excellent} {quality|high quality} writing, {it’s|it is} {rare|uncommon} {to peer|to see|to look} a {nice|great} {blog|weblog} like this one {these days|nowadays|today}..|
{Hi|Hello}, Neat post. {There is|There’s} {a problem|an issue} {with your|together with your|along with your} {site|web site|website} in {internet|web} explorer, {may|might|could|would} {check|test} this? IE {still|nonetheless} is the {marketplace|market} {leader|chief} and {a large|a good|a big|a huge} {part of|section of|component to|portion of|component of|element of} {other folks|folks|other people|people} will {leave out|omit|miss|pass over} your {great|wonderful|fantastic|magnificent|excellent} writing {due to|because of} this problem.|
{I’m|I am} not sure where {you are|you’re} getting your {info|information}, but {good|great} topic. I needs to spend some time learning {more|much more} or understanding more. Thanks for {great|wonderful|fantastic|magnificent|excellent} {information|info} I was looking for this {information|info} for my mission.|
{Hi|Hello}, i think that i saw you visited my {blog|weblog|website|web site|site} {so|thus} i came to “return the favor”.{I am|I’m} {trying to|attempting to} find things to {improve|enhance} my {website|site|web site}!I suppose its ok to use {some of|a few of} your ideas!\

2 thoughts on “God Bless Us Every One (Spammers Too)

  • Dear {webmaster|site owner|blithering idiot},

    This is one of your {funniest|most whimsical|useless} {postings|blogs|lunatic rantings} {I have|I’ve|anyone who can read has} ever {read|witnessed|been appalled by}. If {more|all|absolutely no} {people|readers|minimally sentient beings} {would|could|might even possibly} {read this|enjoy this|retaliate with extreme prejudice} the {world|Internet|American Festival of Mammon} {would|might|could never} be a {better|wonderful|second Black Hole of Calcutta}!

    Keep up the {great|ridiculous|humanly terrific} {work|endeavor|super good undertaking} and have a {merry|joyful|agonizing} {Christmas|Hannukah|Kwaanza|Kuhulu|Krepsicula Prime Androgyny} {holiday|celebration|human sacrifice} and to {all|some|any|griyddrrtgs} a {good|fabulous|enlightening} {night|diurnal passage|planetary orbit}! Your {friend|admirer|stalker} {;-) 🙁 O:-) :-! }
    Reliza recently posted…Our Kind of PeopleMy Profile

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