{"id":30724,"date":"2022-03-30T10:48:38","date_gmt":"2022-03-30T17:48:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/?p=30724"},"modified":"2022-03-30T10:53:18","modified_gmt":"2022-03-30T17:53:18","slug":"my-wiener-has-a-first-name","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/?p=30724","title":{"rendered":"My Wiener Has a First Name"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a title=\"ft_Oscar_Flat_HRF_1500x1000px\" href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/halfmind\/51972092345\/in\/dateposted-public\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/live.staticflickr.com\/65535\/51972092345_95bc009083_m.jpg\" alt=\"ft_Oscar_Flat_HRF_1500x1000px\" width=\"240\" height=\"240\" \/><\/a>It&#8217;s O. S. C. A. R.<\/p>\n<p>You say it&#8217;s bologna, not weiner? Well, how do you know I&#8217;m not thinking of <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/murraythecretinacton.bandcamp.com\/track\/my-weiner-has-a-first-name\">My Wiener Has a First Name<\/a><\/strong> by the Bloody Hells? Huh? Put <em>that<\/em> on your Pandora play list and chew on it!<\/p>\n<p>Leading up to the Academy Awards, Donna and I watched and enjoyed three of the movies in contention. We braved a trip to the theater in January to watch <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt2382320\/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_1\">No Time to Die<\/a>.<\/strong>\u00a0This month, we streamed\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt10366460\/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_1\">Coda<\/a><\/strong> and <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt9620288\/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_1\">King Richard<\/a><\/strong> at home. And that&#8217;s not all.<\/p>\n<p>Science fiction leaves Donna cold, but I at least tried to watch\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt1160419\/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_1\">Dune<\/a><\/strong>. My decades-old dislike of the book got in the way and I didn&#8217;t finish it. Donna and I mutually gave up on <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt10293406\/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_1\">The Power of the Dog<\/a><\/strong>, which in the 30 minutes we watched didn&#8217;t seem to be going anywhere. After enduring the Oscars \u00a0Sunday, we started <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt3581652\/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_1\">West Side Story<\/a><\/strong>, only to abandon it as well. I think Donna and I feel the same about musicals, that they have to be more fantasy than real to be enjoyable, and West Side Story is too real. After seeing Liza Minelli&#8217;s surprise appearance, though, we put\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0068327\/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0\">Cabaret<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0on our HBO Max watchlist, a musical that enthralled us in 1972 that we think will hold up well.<\/p>\n<p>Oh, forgot to mention &#8230; after turning off West Side Story we turned on the 2022 remake of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt7657566\/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1\"><strong>Death on the Nile<\/strong><\/a>, and for the first hour kept expecting the actors to burst into song.<\/p>\n<p>I hear\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt14039582\/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_1\">Drive My Car<\/a><\/strong> is three hours long. I made the mistake of mentioning that to Donna and now she doesn&#8217;t want to stream it, but I love Haruki Murakami&#8217;s writing and want to watch. I think I&#8217;ll just put it on tonight. If it&#8217;s good, she&#8217;ll stay up with me.<\/p>\n<p>So. The slap. I joked on Facebook that it must have been staged, given that the guy who assaulted Chris Rock turns out to be a professional actor (not to mention that it happened on a literal stage, duh). Now, a few days on, I&#8217;m beginning to think it really was just that: staged. For what reason I can&#8217;t fathom. Rich celebrities get up to all kinds of shit, and from what I hear most of them are assholes, so it&#8217;s no concern of mine.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s O. S. C. A. R.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10,413,2],"tags":[3851,3852],"class_list":["post-30724","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-current-events","category-movies-reviews","category-personal","tag-theoscars","tag-theslap"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30724","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=30724"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30724\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":30731,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30724\/revisions\/30731"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=30724"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=30724"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=30724"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}