{"id":25587,"date":"2010-02-22T11:36:49","date_gmt":"2010-02-22T18:36:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/?p=25587"},"modified":"2020-02-22T11:38:22","modified_gmt":"2020-02-22T18:38:22","slug":"ask-dr-down-down-oct-2002","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/?p=25587","title":{"rendered":"Ask Dr. Down-Down: Oct 2002"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>Dear Doctor Down-Down,<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Visitors often compare our hash to theirs in unfavorable ways. Why do visiting hashers behave this way?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>On On,<br \/>\nOffended Host<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Dear Host,<\/p>\n<p>You\u2019ve touched on one of my pet peeves. If it makes you feel any better, just tell yourself that some visitors simply have no manners and let it go at that. Better yet, make copies of the following multiple-choice quiz and give it to visitors when they first arrive, before they start bitching:<\/p>\n<p align=\"center\">What Do Visiting Hashers Actually Mean When They Say _____________?<\/p>\n<p>1. Gee, we do things differently in\u00a0my Hash.<\/p>\n<p>a. Our trail symbols are different.<br \/>\nb. We have a lot of rules back home.<br \/>\nc. Our hash names are more risque than yours.<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks.<\/p>\n<p>2. You don\u2019t mail hash trashes to visitors?<\/p>\n<p>a. You don\u2019t mail hash trashes to visitors?<br \/>\nb. I was at a hash once where they did that, and it was cool.<br \/>\nc. I wish you would take my address and mail me a hash trash even though you\u2019ll never see me again and I won\u2019t return the favor.<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks.<\/p>\n<p>3. In\u00a0my Hash the bimbos get naked at every down-down.<\/p>\n<p>a. I heard that some hashes are really wild, but I\u2019m still looking for one.<br \/>\nb. I saw a woman naked once, but it was my mother, and it was only for a second.<br \/>\nc. I wish my hash were half as much fun as this one is.<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks.<\/p>\n<p>4. You guys don\u2019t believe in marking trail, do you?<\/p>\n<p>a. I got lost.<br \/>\nb. I wasn\u2019t paying attention.<br \/>\nc. I followed some shortcutter and got really lost.<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks.<\/p>\n<p>5. Are all your trails this short?<\/p>\n<p>a. God, I\u2019m glad that was a short trail!<br \/>\nb. That was really fun.<br \/>\nc. I\u2019m so glad that wasn\u2019t a ball-buster like we have at home.<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks.<\/p>\n<p>6. In\u00a0my Hash, the hares spend weeks planning trails.<\/p>\n<p>a. Well, one hare does, but he\u2019s retired and doesn\u2019t have a life anyway.<br \/>\nb. I\u2019ve never hared a trail in my life.<br \/>\nc. I heard about this really awesome trail someone laid, but I wasn\u2019t there that day.<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks.<\/p>\n<p>7. In my Hash, we never have more than one hare, and we always do live trails.<\/p>\n<p>a. But most of the time the hare shows up three hours early and pre-lays 90% of the trail.<br \/>\nb. I\u2019ve never hared a trail in my life.<br \/>\nc. Don\u2019t intend to do one any time soon, either.<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks.<\/p>\n<p>8. You have walkers in your hash?<\/p>\n<p>a. Well, at least there\u2019s no chance of me being DFL.<br \/>\nb. We have walkers too, but I\u2019m not going to admit it.<br \/>\nc. I\u2019d walk myself if I wasn\u2019t trying to impress your harriettes.<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks.<\/p>\n<p>9. You guys sure know a lot of songs!<\/p>\n<p>a. If you won\u2019t sing \u201che\u2019s true blue\u201d over and over, I won\u2019t know the words.<br \/>\nb. At least they all end with \u201cdrink it down, down, down, down!\u201d<br \/>\nc. I love hearing new songs but I\u2019m too lazy to learn any.<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks.<\/p>\n<p>10. Oh, boy, Milwaukee\u2019s Best!<\/p>\n<p>a. Yum, cold beer!<br \/>\nb. This beer sucks (but I\u2019ll drink it).<br \/>\nc. Your hash buys the same cheap shit my hash buys (and I\u2019ll drink it).<br \/>\nd. Your hash is not exactly like my home hash in every detail, therefore it sucks (but I\u2019ll drink your beer).<\/p>\n<p>On On,<br \/>\nDr. Down-Down<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dear Doctor Down-Down, Visitors often compare our hash to theirs in unfavorable ways. Why do visiting hashers behave this way? On On, Offended Host Dear Host, You\u2019ve touched on one of my pet peeves. If it makes you feel any better, just tell yourself that some visitors simply have no manners and let it go [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-25587","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-hash-house-harriers"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25587","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=25587"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25587\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":25588,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25587\/revisions\/25588"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=25587"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=25587"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pwoodford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=25587"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}