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Pedalfiles Bash Trash: 7/16/17

It’s July, so it must be time for the Third Annual Loose Nut hareless bash. Yes, we still follow the same map he handed out in 2015:

Scan 1

Loose Nut’s map

The pack was small but convivial, actually a good turnout for what promised to be a hot morning in Tucson. Here we are on the patio of Time Market on University Avenue:


On-afters (Candy Man was there too, taking photos)

For a summary of the trail, I’ll paraphrase the writeup from 2015:

… a pleasant 11-mile ride on bicycle-route streets with a beer stop at Bob Dobbs’, a Tucson hashing landmark, then back along a the shaded Aviation Bikeway to on-ins back at the Time Market.

What made 2017 different? Barbecue Cock’s Curse. She didn’t even get out of the Time Market parking lot at the start—her derailleur and chain got eaten by the spokes of her rear wheel and her bike was down for the count. Three hashers named Mike helped her load it in the back of a car, and one of the 3M gang gave her a ride to the beer check and later to the end.

But the Curse wasn’t done with her. After the bash one of the Mikes drove her and her bike to a bike shop so she could see about getting it fixed, where—in a different parking lot—someone drove over her bike and smashed the frame.

Yet to be determined: does Barbecue Cock’s Curse apply to bicycles or parking lots, or both, or to Barbecue Cock in general? We’ll see when she shows up for her next bash on a new bike.


Curse Strike #1

Curse Strike #2

Upcoming events:

No word yet on the August bash, scheduled for sunday, Aug 20.

In September, our GM Arthur Gash wants to get a group together to go to the Crank Wankers bash in Phoenix on Sunday, Sep 10, then to the Monthly Cycle bash in Sierra Vista on Sunday, Sep 24. Of course we’re hoping Phoenix and Sierra Vista bashers will join us in Tucson for our Pedalfiles bash on Sunday, Sep 17, hared by Arthur Gash.

October will mark the 11th OnOniversary of the Pedalfiles, and yours truly will be haring.

More information on these upcoming events is coming.


“Hash Run” Not a Smash in Weldon

I don’t know … last time I went by a weekend tent revival, it seemed very loud to me, and I’m not at all sure the people who came to it had the “proper conduct expected for people who come in for the weekend.”
—Flying Booger

From the Roanoke Rapids NC Daily Herald:

“Hash run” not a smash in Weldon

by John Dixon
July 9, 2017

Members of the Tidewater Hash House Harriers make their way through knee deep water in the undated photo courtesy of Facebook

• Hash run held in Weldon

• Attendees of run did not show “proper conduct,” official says

• Town officials voice displeasure

Weldon officials harbor uneasiness toward the July 1 “hash run,” which had 10 Sycamore Street as a meeting point for attendees.

The weekend group in Weldon is a spin off and the worldwide group the Hash House Harriers, which bills itself as a social running group that’s a “drinking club with a running problem.” Leaders of an event, known as “Hares,” are given the task of marking a trail to direct runners, throwing in some dead ends and forks as challenges.

A web page for the July 1 event promised a “weekend full of beer, food, beer, giveaway, beer, trail, beer, tubing, beer…” that overlapped on the same day with Weldon’s own Independence Day celebrations.

“The hash run, as far as it was discussed in our work session (this past week), had to do with the group who came during the 4th of July weekend,” said town Commissioner Stanley Edwards. “I understand it’s been in the Weldon area at one point. People in the area had great concerns about the many people who came in and didn’t have the proper conduct expected for people who come in for the weekend.”

The hash run was part of the multi-day 19th annual Tubing in the South event organized by the Tidewater Hash House Harriers, an offshoot of the Hash House Harriers.

Weldon Mayor Julia Meacham said the town has seen several similar events in past years but expressed a negative view of this year’s.

“I went by the location over the weekend and it seemed very loud to me,” she said. “I don’t think this is the type of event that helps Weldon in any manner.”

Meacham added, however, that the hash run did not interfere with the Independence Day celebrations to her knowledge.

When the Weldon Board of Commissioners meets Monday on a long agenda for its monthly meeting on, the hash run will be discussed, as well as talk of other events past and present. A Garysburg church has requested the use of River Falls Park for a five night tent revival.

Edwards said, “The request had to do with having a tent revival on the ball field portion of the park,” Edwards said.

Meacham said the town has seen “three or four” revivals in past years.


Random Updates from Hashland

There have been so many “suspicious white powder” confrontations between hashers and the Man I’ve pretty much quit tracking them, but this one stands out.

Screen Shot 2017-05-02 at 5.11.59 PM

Click image for story

Why? Because it happened in Singapore, a city/state smaller even than Hong Kong, and like Hong Kong home to several active hashes (including the second-oldest kennel, Singapore HHH, founded by Ian Cumming in 1962). You would think Singaporean authorities, if not the general public, would be familiar with hashing, hashers, and hash trail markings. Actually, I’m sure they are. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that laying trail through a subway station, in other countries a prime terrorism target, was a less than stellar idea. Civilians became alarmed, and my guess is the authorities—probably knowing all along the marks were left by hashers—were put in a position where they had to respond.

This time it looks like a bit of a crackdown is taking place. According to this follow-up article, the Singapore National Parks Board wants hashers to stop marking trails in areas managed by the board. Specifically, they will not allow chalk or flour: ”Only toilet or tissue paper are allowed to be used as markings, and they must be cleaned up immediately after the event.”

We’re used to chalk and flour in the States, but hashers in Asia often use shredded paper. I’ve hashed paper trails in Singapore, Thailand, Hong Kong, and Japan. Many of those trails were quite long, and I have a hard time imagining the hare who, after a well-lubricated circle and on-after, would willingly go back over the trail to clean up the paper.

I can think of a few occasions where police have forced American hares to go back over their trails to sweep up flour and scrub chalk marks away, which is far harder than picking up paper. How many of us would be willing to hare if we had to clean up afterward?

Better to keep a low profile and not get caught, I’m thinking. And rethink laying trail through areas where civilians might freak and put the authorities into response mode. As I’ve said many times, hashing is an underground thing, and we need to keep it that way.

Here is my favorite bike hash photo ever, taken by a fellow Pedalfiler in Tucson, Deep Dish:


And last, this. The final case on the list is still in litigation, and that is why I will not be releasing my tax returns.



Pedalfiles Bash Trash: 3/19/17

On a beautiful and warm Sunday morning the pack—which included a large contingent of Monthly Cycle bashers from Sierra Vista—assembled at Serial Grillers on River Road for a bash trail laid by Spin Cycle and Just James.


Group grope at the start

Trail looped west and north from the start and after a little uphill led us to a beer check at a neighborhood park, where the refreshments included lime Eegees infused with Patrón tequila, in fitting with the green St. Patrick’s Day theme.


Selfie at the beer check

The second half of the trail was a bit shorter than the first because the hares decided at the last minute not to do a planned loop on the Rillito Bikeway, but instead take us on-in to the end. Before we repaired to Serial Grillers for on-afters, GM Arthur Gash formed a circle in the alleyway out back so that we could do something about Just James’ deplorable lack of a hash name. Behold our newest named member: Correctum Officer!


Namings: good clean fun!

At on-afters I heard Spin Cycle confess that she and Correctum Officer scouted trail beforehand, and that they put some thought into the best ways to get bashers across heavy car traffic on River Road. I want to include a note of thanks for taking the time and trouble to make sure we had an excellent and fun trail … good haring really shows.

Pick’n'Flick got on Facebook afterward to whinge about the tradition of beering and flouring in the naming circle. She was probably thinking about the time she went to work without noticing the crusted beer and flour in her hair, left over from a hash the day before. If only she’d soaked her head a little longer!


Hashing Straight, Ten Years Later

leprechaun-drunk-iconI gave up drinking ten years ago this month. Not sure if today’s the exact day, but marking the on-oniversary on Saint Patrick’s Day seems appropriate, so I’m going with it. Erin go bragh!

I came to hashing as a member of a profession with tight camaraderie and similar drinking and singing rituals, flying fighters for the USAF, and felt at home right from the start. As fellow hashers, I’m sure you’ll understand when I say that when I decided to quit drinking my biggest worry was whether I’d have to give up hashing.

Happily, once I quit the desire to drink went away too, and I was able to keep hashing. Being around alcohol is a huge problem for many recovering alcoholics; believe me I’m thankful it hasn’t been a problem for me. I quickly realized I didn’t like being around drunks, though. Not because they’re contagious, but because they remind me of my former self. So I came to a compromise: I still hash, but you won’t find me at the circle.

Non-drinking hashers are the exception, but we exist. Please think of us when you stock the coolers (I’ve been to some hashers where the only options were beer and beer).

I’ve noticed that most hashers my age drink a lot less than they used to. Over the past ten years I’ve gravitated to daytime hashes where there’s less of an emphasis on drinking. Currently I’m in a bicycle hash that meets and rides in the morning. After the rides we go to a pub for food and drink, strictly BYO$, so there’s no keg, no circle. It’s the perfect kind of hash for a non-drinking hasher. Matter of fact, there’s one tomorrow morning, and I’m looking forward to it.

One thing I know better than to do is to lecture my fellow hashers about the evils of drinking. We all have to find our own way on-in; I’m happy with the trail I’ve chosen and wish you well on yours. Happy Saint Patrick’s Day, everyone!


A Quilt of My Own

Pick’n'Flick’s sister Robin is here for a few days, and they’re putting a hash T-shirt quilt together for me. I’m pretty excited about it.


Pick’n'Flick’s been putting old hash shirts aside over the years. Actually, she and Robin are using backup shirts … they weren’t able to find the stack of shirts Pick’n'Flick meant to use. They’re around somewhere (we’ll probably find them as soon as this quilt is done), so maybe some day we’ll have two quilts.

I think the first hash T-shirt quilt Pick’n'Flick ever made was for Hasher Humper. She made one for Zippety Doo, and another for Upchuck & Die.* She’s done several embroidery projects for other hash friends. You’ll be happy to know her sister Robin is a hasher too … still a no-name, but so far only hashing hands have touched this new quilt.

When the quilt is done, it’ll have a binding (?), a backing, and on-on foot stitching. Here are three thumbnails of earlier quilts Pick’n'Flick made (click to see them larger). The models are Upchuck and Wet Toe Job.

IMG_2277 IMG_1838


One of Pick’n'Flick’s better ideas is to embroider the recipient’s hashing history on one panel of the quilt. Here’s mine.


I wasn’t sure how to describe my membership in special kennels like the Iguanas and the Fat Boys Athletic Club, so I wrote down “Honorary Member.” I mean, if you’re an Iguana you’re an Iguana, but somehow I don’t think it’s the same as being a member of your local weekly or monthly hash. And what about all the hashes I’ve run with as a visitor? There are too many to list, which is why we decided to go with “Countries Hashed.”

When the quilt is done I’ll post more photos.

*Without meaning to make light of it, I must note that Hasher Humper and Zippety Doo are now hashing with Gispert, and Upchuck & Die literally has the word “die” in his name. I can only pray there’s no curse attached to these lovely quilts!


Love the Bash, Hate the Name

Just putting this out there: I hate the name of Tucson’s bicycle hash kennel, the Pedalfiles. One, it’s misspelled (although that may be intentional). Two, it repels outsiders (if there’s one thing no one jokes about, it’s sex with children). Three, it has an impact on membership, discouraging recruits who haven’t been exposed to hash humor (I’ve experienced this first hand, talking to bicyclists who see us on trail and ask what we’re doing).

When I tell people about bashing, I avoid telling them the name of our group. I wonder, do other members feel the same way?

Discuss if you wish; comments are open.


Origins of On On?

Where does “On On” come from? Who knows? The only thing I’m fairly certain of is that it didn’t come from hashing.

A few years ago I got into an argument with another hasher. He insisted it was a hasher who first came up with the “Drinking Club with a Running Problem” motto, sometime in the 1970s. I said I didn’t think so, because if you Google “drinking club with a ______ problem” you’ll find drinking clubs with mountain climbing problems, drinking clubs with bicycling problems, drinking clubs with yachting problems, and so on.

The earliest documented use I’ve found dates back to 1946. “A Drinking Club with a Motorcycle Problem” appears on the patch of an early outlaw motorcycle club, the Boozefighters MC (the bikers who raised hell in Hollister, California in 1947, inspiring the 1953 Marlon Brando movie The Wild One). If you can find a quote from G or Torch Bennett or Horse Thomson where they used the motto in the late 1930s or early 1940s, I’ll reconsider. But as far as I know we never called ourselves a drinking club with a running problem before the 1970s.

The other day, after I wrote about Hash Haven, the online support group for hashers dealing with depression and suicidal thoughts, members there had a long debate about what many of them see as a hurtful, politically incorrect, and exclusionary motto used by some hash kennels: “No Poofters.” That never originated in the hash; it came from the 1970 Monty Python Bruces sketch. In the heyday of Monty Python, a lot of hashers thought the no poofters refrain was funny, and somehow it morphed into an unofficial motto.

How about “Rule Number One Is There Are No Rules”? It’s possible a hasher first said it, but if you Google it you’ll find it’s a widely used phrase. Thomas Edison allegedly said something similar in 1903: “Hell, there are no rules here. We’re trying to accomplish something.”

Okay, back to “On On.” This morning Chippendale sent me some information on the Royal Air Force’s 272 Squadron, which flew anti-submarine patrols from Scotland in WWI and long range shipping escort missions in the Mediterranean during WWII, and whose motto was … well, you’ll never guess:

272 squadron

The plaques and patches I looked up all say On On, but the linked history of the squadron says it was actually On, On! (with an exclamation point, which is how many hashers say it as well). Looking at the symbol of the armored knight, I can’t help wondering if the phrase dates back even farther … possibly even to the Crusades?

There’s no point to any of this, other than to say that the hash knows a good thing when it sees it and isn’t ashamed to borrow when necessary. On, On!