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Nineteen Questions: Garfield

Garfielf

Marty “Garfield” Hanratty is an American hasher currently living in Fort Leavenworth, Kansas. He hashes with the DCHHH and Indonostalgia HHH. He’s been hashing and interhashing for 33 years.

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When & where was your first hash?

Seoul Korea, 1975.

How did Garfield find the hash, or did the hash find Garfield?

Two workmates lied to me and said they were taking me out for drinks and a meal.

How did you get your hash name?

This is a bit long, but here goes. While running with the Jakarta Men’s Hash in Indonesia. I used to spend my spare time serving as a dive master for trips out to some coral islands off the coast of Java. One day at the embassy, a fellow asked if he and his wife could accompany me on one of the trips. After extracting myself from the bars in Bloc M, I raced home, picked up a case of beer and my dive equipment, collected my guests and we were off to the harbor. As we proceeded to the first dive site, a lovely coral island in the middle of the South China Sea, I told my guests I was going to grab some sleep below and suggested they do the same. When we got to the site after 4 hours, I assembled the other 20 divers and snorkelers, told them we would be there until 1:00 and advised them to piss off. After a nice dive, we blew the ship’s horn, waited for everyone to get on deck, and we were off to the next dive site. On our return to Jakarta on the next day, another diver asked if he could have a ride back into town. I apologized, saying that the van was full with me and my guests. It was then that I realized that my guests were nowhere to be found. We raced back to the first island only to find a large HELP sign outlined in coral on the beach. The local lighthouse keeper indicated that they had stayed with him the night before and had caught a boat back to Jakarta that morning. On the return, we ran out of beer but were pleased to find that we had one cold box that hadn’t been use . . . my guests’. Wanting to reduce weight, we quickly liberated the beer and food in the box. On return, I went out to the guests’ house to apologize and see if they were all right. As I walked down the driveway, I was met by my irate guest who promptly took a swing at me. Dropping the cold box on his foot, I quickly did a runner down the drive and got the hell out of there. Next Monday, I was quietly minding my own business on the hash when I was called into the circle and placed on ice. After 20 minutes on the heavenly orb, I was advised that my new hash name was to be Garfield. Who else would leave his friends on a coral island just to get at their beer and food?

Who taught you the most about hashing?

Dave “Browneye” Ives, a Kiwi gentleman hasher, who went on to the big Hash in the sky in 2006.

When & where was your first away hash?

Interhash 88 in Pattaya, Thailand.

Where have you hashed?

There are too many individual hashes to name so I limit myself to the hashes I have been a member of: Seoul Men’s H3; The Night Runners of Bengal (Dhaka Men’s H3); Jakarta Men’s H3 (Indonesia); the Indonostalgia H3 (UK), DC H3 and The White House H3 (Washington, DC); Addis Ababa H3 (Ethiopia), Harare H3 (Zimbabwe) and the New Babylon H3 (al Hillah, Iraq).

What do you most love about hashing?

The friendship and the thirst you develop on the hash.

What don’t you love about hashing?

The running, stupid!

What’s the best thing that ever happened to you at a hash?

Meeting Browneye, the Penguin, Whorator, Chesty, Froggy, Hash Willie, Mr. Magoo, Mellow Foreskin Cheese, XYZ and GBH.

What’s the worst thing that ever happened to you at a hash?

Being carried out to sea after turning over in a small boat accompanied by 3 other drunken hashers at 3:00 in the morning off of Java Head, Indonesia.

If you could pick the location of a future Interhash, where would it be, and why?

After organizing Interhash 98 in Goa, any place where I don’t have to do that again.

Have any of your attitudes toward hashing or hashers changed over the years?

No, it’s still a piss up for a bunch of drunks.

What are some of your favorite haring techniques?

Shagging my lovely cohare in the bushes while laying the run on Mt. Toto, Ethiopia.

Do you tell everyone you meet about the hash, or only people you think might become good hashers?

Are you kidding, and reduce the volume of the holy amber fluid available for me and my mates?

Have you founded any hashes?

Africa Interhash, the New Babylon H3 (Al Hillah, Iraq).

What do you think you’ve contributed to hashing?

F@$k all.

Are there any core fundamentals you believe all hashes and hashers should embrace?

Don’t take it seriously, it’s a vacation away from your real-world job where you have to take things seriously.

Speaking of core fundamentals, what does Garfield stand for?

- Kegs or cans: Yes

- Live hare or dead hare: Iced hares

- A-to-A trails or A-to-B trails: Yes

Garfield, what’s in your hashing future?

To continue hashing as long as I can.

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