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Ask Doctor Down-Down: November 2011

With Dr. Down-Down Without Dr. Down-Down

Dear Hasher, are you DFL, DOT, and SOL? Well, cheer up! On-ins are closer than you think. Just ask Doctor Down-Down to show you the way!

Dear Doctor Down-Down,

I signed up for World InterHash 2012 in Jogjakarta, Indonesia, sending $200 to register. Good thing I didn’t already book the flight or hotel, because two months ago I got an email from Stray Dog saying World InterHash had been taken away from Indonesia and re-awarded to Mombasa, Kenya! So I signed up for Kenya, which cost me another $225.

Then, a month later, I got another email from Stray Dog. Now it seems World InterHash 2012 is going to be in Orlando, Florida. The good part is the price has been reduced to $69.95, but I’m still out the $425 I already spent.

I guess my question is, why does the World InterHash venue keep changing? I thought that once they announced the next one it was official. Isn’t that how it always used to work? Now, it’s like every month or so they announce a change, and I know I’m not the only one who’s confused. Oh, well, at least there’s finally going to be a World InterHash in the USA, something they said would never happen. Ha!

That Stray Dog — he must really have good sources! I read the hash list every day, check in regularly on HashSpace, and have the online hash calendars bookmarked, and if it weren’t for Stray Dog’s emails I never would have known about these important developments. Imagine how disappointed I would have been to show up at Jogjakarta or Mombasa only to learn InterHash was somewhere else! I bet a lot of hashers don’t know about any of this, and already have tickets to Indonesia or Kenya — those poor people!

Seriously, someone needs to take down the Indonesia and Kenya websites and those online hash calendars and just make Stray Dog the single source of information for InterHash. Things are a mess right now but Stray Dog can straighten it all out, if only we let him!

On On,
Orlando-Bound InterHasher

A short note from Flying Booger:

Dear readers, as you know, Dr. Down-Down is serving a prison sentence in Wyoming, and I’ve taken over as Half-Mind advice columnist. But this letter seemed important so I forwarded it to the doctor at the Laramie Mens’ Correctional Facility, where it apparently got through the censors. Here is Dr. Down-Down’s answer:

Dear OBI,

They won’t let me have pencils or pens lest I use them to shank someone in the showers, but I can have crayons, so I’m dashing off a short reply. Hope you don’t mind Lemon Yellow … it was the only color they’d give me, the fuckers.

For years now, hashers have been bitching about the crowds at InterHash. I’m glad to see Stray Dog tackling the problem! By unilaterally declaring Indonesia bogus and naming Kenya the real host, he cut the number of InterHash attendees from 5,000 to less than 1,000 in one bold stroke. But genius that he is, he realized that 900+ hashers is still a crowd, so he moved it to Orlando and now you’ll be attending an event with about 100 other hashers, maybe 120 tops … the elite of the elite. Why, by the end of the weekend, you’ll probably know every one of them personally! Most of them will be from the Orlando area, which means you’ll have your pick of hash crash pads next time you visit Disney World!

So congratulations, and sorry about the $425 you threw away on non-Stray Dog sanctioned “interhashes.”

On On,
Doctor Down-Down

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