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Paul's Thing is a
Gang of Six™ Production

E-Reading

Tree-Reading

Credit


Shit hot header photos by Paul, w/assistance from "The Thing?"

Copyright

Copyright 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014 by Paul Woodford. All rights reserved.

Most Hated Agency?

Businesses that employ professional drivers require applicants to submit copies of their driving records. And where do applicants go to get copies? Duhn-duhn-duhn-duhn . . . yes, Virginia, the Department of Motor Vehicles . . . there, there, I didn’t mean to make you cry!

It could have been worse. It took only three hours, [...]

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Well, Duh . . .

I don’t like to simply link to another blogger’s post, but damn, Photodude couldn’t be more spot on than he is in this entry.

Then again, if it weren’t for institutional absurdity, where would we get all the good jokes? For sure, Joseph Heller would never have been able to write Catch-22. . . .

[...]

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What Happens in Vegas . . .

Las Vegas: What Happens Here, Stays Here.

I hate that slogan. Like people go to Las Vegas for sex orgies or something. The people I see on the Strip are with their spouses, and, quite often, their children. They’re doing things in Vegas that need to stay in Vegas?

We drove up last weekend to [...]

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ATTENTION CREEPS!

THE TREE-CREEPS ARE GIVING ME NIGHTMARES! CALL KING WINKLES ON HIS SUBMARINE TELEPHONES! CLICK ON THE TREE-CREEP’S PHOTO! IT IS A LINK!!!!

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Finders Keepers

There are scumbags, and then there are scumbags:

The injured employee was immediately sent to the hospital less than 2 miles away. The General Manager then went to the serving counter to have the machine shut down, begin the sanitizing procedures and remove the affected bucket of custard. In the few moments between the time [...]

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The Preverbal Nail

Oh, God, this is funny (thanks to Apostropher for the link)!

I was going to classify the preverbal nail with other eggcorns I’ve come across, but on second thought it’s more of a malapropism. You can understand why someone who doesn’t read much might mishear “for all intents and purposes” as “for all intensive purposes.” [...]

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Social Security Queens in Cadillacs, Oh My!

From Obsidian Wings:

The men in my family of my father’s generation returned home after serving their country and got jobs in the local steel mills, as had their fathers and their grandfathers. In exchange for their brawn, sweat, and expertise, the steel mills promised these men certain benefits. In exchange for Social Security taxes [...]

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